You don’t just marry one person, you marry their family – that’s the phrase many people like to invoke when it comes to new unions. It’s a minor, tongue-in-cheek warning that there are other people involved in your marriage whether you like it or not. What many couples don’t anticipate is that in-laws could have more to do with their relationship than they ever expected, and the feelings this causes have a good chance of leading to a Michigan divorce.
Signs the In-Laws Are Causing Problems in Your Union
You chose one person to be your partner, but most people come with family that you need to tolerate, at the very least. You didn’t choose these extra people deliberately, but you have by default joined their clan.
In every relationship – romantic or otherwise – people are on their best behavior at the start. As the years go by and it’s clear how the dynamics work between you, your spouse, and your in-laws, it can get tougher to put up with things you don’t like.
When there are problems with in-laws, there are more likely to be problems between a couple, especially if you answer “yes” to any of the following questions:
- Do you skip family gatherings to avoid in-laws?
- Are you offended, upset, or insulted by in-law behavior?
- Have your in-laws criticized your relationship with your spouse?
- Have you and your partner argued because of in-law actions or words?
- Have you ever considered divorcing your spouse because of your in-laws?
- Do you feel like your partner is more dedicated to your in-laws than you?
Ways In-Laws Can Contribute to a Michigan Divorce
When two people fall in love with each other, life is magical. Slowly, important people in their lives are introduced to the relationship. Ideally, they stay on the periphery, coming in only when invited and not interrupting the growth, development, and foundation of the relationship. Eventually, though, folks get comfortable with each other and have less hesitation about revealing their true colors. This all-or-nothing attitude can eat away at a marriage when spouse and in-law butt heads either passive aggressively or loudly and often.
From friend choices to political beliefs, finances to career, appearance to religious beliefs, there are plenty of fundamental elements of a person’s life that can be criticized, but when people who are supposed to support your spouse, you, and your marriage are the ones passing judgment, it hurts a relationship. Some of the biggest complaints people make about their in-laws include:
- Gossiping about you
- Violating boundaries
- Acting like the victim
- Manipulating your spouse
- Invading your privacy
- Undermining parenting
- Criticizing you
- Excluding you from family events
Making the Choice to Start a Michigan Divorce
Ultimately, divorce is usually never about one issue alone. There are multiple problems, that occur over time to feed a disintegrating union. In-laws can be one of those toxic elements. There are also other matters to consider – parenting time, spousal support, child custody, and changing your life to separate yourself from your partner (and their family).
If you find yourself ready to talk to a lawyer about divorce, contact a family law attorney at Femminineo Attorneys in Mt. Clements to learn more about filing for divorce in Michigan.