You may be ready to end your marriage and firm in your decision, not a doubt in your mind. However, there are some realities of divorce people may not consider before the papers are signed. Once the legal matters are complete, you will learn many realities the hard way.
1. Have Kids? You’ll Be Connected Forever
If you and your ex have children together you will always be tied to each other. The realities of this may not set in until you begin to truly live the parenting time guidelines you negotiated. You will have to communicate with each other, see each other, and may feel resentful of each other when one person gets holidays and special occasions to spend with the kids.
2. Your Health Could Suffer
The fallout from divorce can manifest mentally and physically. The emotional turmoil that accompanies a split, no matter how much you want and need this change in your life, is especially problematic for women who experience chronic physical health problems exacerbated by losses in household income and increases in childcare demands.
The divorce process is one of the most stressful life experiences, a traumatic event that affects the body through rising levels of anxiety and debilitating physical symptoms like memory and concentration problems, joint pain and body aches, and sleep difficulty and exhaustion.
3. The Worst Parts of Your Marriage Will Die Hard
Everything you have ever hated or disliked about your marriage or partner will awaken like a three-headed dog during divorce. Expect to experience the ongoing dysfunction or communication problems or petty arguments that you and your ex have always had, and don’t be surprised when unspoken issues come rising to the surface.
You’ll be reminded again and again why you’ve chosen divorce. For some people, that’s a good thing. For others, it’s torture.
4. Friends and Family Will Take Sides
The most important people in your life will choose sides between you and your ex. Someone you thought was a close friend and part of your social foundation may unfriend you and never speak to you again. This behavior is hurtful, sad, and insulting, but it shouldn’t be a surprise.
You’ll tell your side of the divorce and your ex will tell theirs. People will choose where their loyalties lie – and the ones who are not conflicted will show just whose side they’ve always been on, and they will talk. Expect your social circle to shift dramatically.
5. You Will Go Through Divorce Grief
You will mourn the loss of your marriage, even if you and your ex both want the divorce. Whether you like it or not, your identity is wrapped up in being someone’s partner and the future you envisioned together is over. Losing can feel like death – but eventually you will see that your losses are gains. It will take time to make it to the point where you celebrate your new identity. Don’t fail to grieve the end of your marriage first.
Need support with the realities of divorce in Michigan? Schedule a consultation with Femminineo Attorneys in Mt. Clemens, MI.